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Wow! I haven’t made it off the first page of the dictionary and we’re already talking about killing. Then again, it’s only the killing of animals that are destined for our dinner tables, so who the hell cares one whit?

OK. The vicious, possibly physically violent attacks from members of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) should begin in 5 … 4 … 3 … 2 … 1 …

For the benefit of anyone who didn’t know what an abattoir was and hasn’t figured it out from the preceding statement, an abattoir is a slaughterhouse.

If you don’t know what a slaughterhouse is then you’re illiterate. You have my sympathies, but it’s going to be a long time before I work my way through to the S words in this project, so you’ll have to be patient.

When I finally get there—if I finally get there—then, in the unlikely event that I remember to do so, I’ll come back here and put a link to the slaughterhouse entry. But don’t be surprised if that entry simply says, “see abattoir.” I’m going to be punchy and overwhelmingly eager to move on by that point.

I’m an unabashed (do you like the way I worked in the word from just two entries ago?) omnivore so, in my infrequent rational moments, I think that abattoirs are honorable institutions and the people who work in them, under what to me would seem like horrible circumstances, are noble individuals doing jobs that I very much want done but which I very much don’t want to do myself. If cows were capable of such thoughts, they would probably disagree with me on that.

In fact, if cows had brains in their heads capable of intelligent thought, PETA would have no trouble in recruiting them to participate in riotous protest marches against abattoirs.

But, cows aren’t capable of such critical thought, so the hell with them! Pass the steaks and praise the abattoirs!

By the way, abattoir comes from the French word abattre, which, according to Google Translate means, among other things, slaughter. If you’ve ever had a tasty bavette steak in a French restaurant, preferably in France, you’ll know why the French came up with the word for slaughterhouse first. A well prepared bavette steak is a culinary delight. And you can’t make a steak without breaking some cows; or is that omelets and eggs? Whatever.

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