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Adorable means lovable or delightful.

Babies are adorable, at least to their parents. In truth, I think most babies are adorable. Maybe that’s only because I’m not now, nor have I ever been a father and I have changed only a couple of diapers in my life.

People of the opposite sex—usually women in the eyes of men—may or may not be adorable. This might be a sexist thing to say, but, I’m sorry, I don’t find all women adorable. That doesn’t mean I dislike them or that I find anything wrong with them. It’s just that, to my tastes, not all women are not adorable. And one or two of them are downright nasty.

Nevertheless, I can’t tell you how many women I’ve found adorable over the course of my life. Honestly. I can’t tell you. I’ve never counted. But it’s probably roughly the same number of women as have given me the friend speech.

Purses, articles of clothing and houses are not adorable. Never. No how. No way. Maybe that’s just a guy thing or just a me thing, but that’s the way I see it.

They are things. They might be aesthetically pleasing. They might be exceptionally functional. But they’re not adorable. Those of you who call them that should stop. You know who you are.

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