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all-time

An all-time is a clock or watch that only tells the time.

An all-time isn’t integrated into a cell phone. It doesn’t have a radio or alarm built into it. It won’t tell you the temperature, humidity and/or barometric pressure. It doesn’t offer a nightlight, or a daylight for that matter. It doesn’t include a wifi/cellular antenna and browser. It doesn’t have a dock for your iPhone or iPod. And it won’t massage you in a sexual or other way (although, please let me know if anyone has invented such a thing; I’d be happy to be an early beta tester for it). An all-time just tells the time.

Ah, the good old days.

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