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amorous

Amorous, an adjective that describes an emotional state, is rather difficult to define, let alone explain. It’s sort of like the feeling you get when, after spending at least a week to ten days in deep, silent, solitary meditation—possibly at a secluded monastery, convent, ashram or New Age self-actualization retreat nestled in expansive tranquil grounds that include lush vegetation, calming koi ponds and lots of nooks and crannies so you don’t have to have your deepening empty-headedness intruded upon by other meditators—you are struck by a blinding epiphany—an epiphany that is as transparent to you as crystal-pure air and as bright as the intensity of a thousand suns, although not quite as hot—an epiphany that makes you suddenly realize—without the faintest of a shadow or a scintilla of doubt—that silent solitude isn’t all that its cracked up to be—not even close.

That sort of experience also tends to lead you to write difficult-to-follow, insufferably long run-on sentences that include a bunch of unnecessary, confusing, incorrectly used em-dashes that more get in the way than provide aid in reading. But never mind that. It has nothing to do with the word amorous.

The pertinent point here is that at that brilliant instant of sterling, raw insight, a mantra spontaneously wells up unbidden from the very core of your being and, despite your attempts to hold it inside to avoid embarrassing yourself, forces you to chant, “ahhh, more us.”

If meditation hadn’t so completely cleared your head of rational thought, you might have added, “and less only me.” In any sort of deep meditative state, that’s probably the most coherence one can hope for.

As one can clearly see, most people pronounce the word amorous incorrectly, i.e., with a leading “a,” as in the indefinite article “a,” rather than “ahhh.” Then again, most people are nescient morons, so what the hell would you expect from them?

The sensation you get at the moment of epiphany that leads to the extemporaneous chanting of an “ahh, more us” mantra is sort of, but not anywhere close to exactly like feeling amorous. The primary difference is that an amorous state is much more likely to lead to heartache, manic-depressive psychosis or, possibly, heartburn. Its often difficult to tell the difference between heartache, manic-depressive psychosis and heartburn.

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