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af – ah Archive


Posted October 18, 2013 By Joel

Ahoy is a greeting that, apparently, is common among seamen. I would’t know about that because I only use commercial aircraft to travel across oceans, so I’m not familiar with seamen or their greetings.

I’ve heard the word ahoy used as a greeting or in the phrase “ship ahoy!” by seamen in movies. But they were all fictional films, so who knows if seamen really talk like that?

I had to proofread the previous paragraphs several times. I wanted to make sure I didn’t leave out the “a” in “seamen.” To the best of my knowledge, semen isn’t capable of issuing greetings of any kind. I didn’t want to risk misleading anyone with a careless typo.

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Posted October 17, 2013 By Joel

Now I’m really starting to get pissed off. A few entries ago I complained about ah and aha being in the dictionary because I don’t consider them to be words, but rather sounds that one makes in certain circumstances.

And now we get to ahem, the sound one makes when one clears one’s throat. According to the dictionary, ahem is used to get attention or express mild disapproval.

Fine. Next!


Posted October 17, 2013 By Joel

If you’re not ahead you’re behind. If you give head that’s something completely different and not at all a suitable topic of discussion for the intended audience of this Web site. However, under the right circumstances, giving head might help you get ahead.

Ahead can also mean in a forward direction, as in, “moving ahead.” Most people want their careers to move ahead unless they don’t want the pressure and increased salary that generally comes with a higher position.

I can understand why they wouldn’t want the increase pressure, but the extra money? Money is nice to have. You heard it here first.

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Posted October 17, 2013 By Joel

Jeez! If you want to know what I have to say about the “word” aha, please read the entry on the “word” ah. You’ll figure it out.

My dictionaries tell me that aha is used to indicate the experiencing of surprise, derision, amused discovery and satisfaction, among other emotions.

Aha! Enough said.


Posted October 17, 2013 By Joel

Get real! Why is ah in the dictionary?

Ah isn’t a word. It’s a sound. Sure, it’s used in literary works, but it’s used to indicate a sound that people make.

Why not also include eeeaaAAACKKEEECKEEECK in the dictionary? That’s the sound people make when they achieve an orgasm. What? You’ve never heard anyone make that sound in that circumstance? Maybe it’s just me.

The dictionaries I’m using say that ah is used to express a range of emotions, such as pleasure, regret, contempt, surprise, and sympathy, among others. With ah used to express so many different emotions, some of which are conflicting, how are we supposed to know which is intended in any particular instance?

I think we should come up with a bunch of different sound-words to make it easier to distinguish between them. I suggest “yoz,” “xien,” “pwinz,” and “qwiswang.” I’ve done the hard work of coming up with the sounds. You decide which emotions they should express.


Posted October 17, 2013 By Joel

I misread this word when I got to it in this project. I thought it said “argue.” I was about to dash off an incensed note to the dictionary’s publisher to complain about the misplacement of the word in the dictionary when I noticed that the word was missing an “r.”

The word ague has nothing whatsoever to do with the word argue. Ague is malaria or any other disease that involves recurring fevers, sweating and shivering.

I would argue that ague is not something you would want to have, he said in a vain attempt to turn his poor reading habits into something useful.


Posted October 17, 2013 By Joel

If you’re in a boat and you’ve run aground then you’ve run up on the, presumably shallow, bottom of the body of water that your boat is on, or your boat has run up onto the shore. In either case, you’re probably not going to be going anywhere fast unless you leave your boat.

I’m not a sailor, but I suspect that running aground is not considered to be a good thing in most circumstances. If any nautical people are reading this, please correct me in a comment below if I’m wrong about that.


Posted October 16, 2013 By Joel

The word agronomy sounds like it could be derived from the same root as the word agriculture. There’s a good reason for that. It is.

Agronomy is a subset of the science of agriculture. It deals solely with the growing of field crops and with soil management. It leaves out the livestock-raising that is part of the broader category, agriculture.

In the previous entry, which was on the word agriculture, I praised the work of agriculture practitioners and scientists. I definitely intended to include the agronomy sect of agriculture in that praise. So, bravo to agronomists.


Posted October 16, 2013 By Joel

Where would we be without agriculture? Running around in loincloths or animal skins while we busy ourselves with hunting and/or gathering, that’s were.

I don’t know about you, but I much prefer to buy my fruits, vegetables, meat, fish and natural-fiber clothing in a store rather than having to leave the city to find, and possibly catch, some of my own. So, thank goodness for our ancient ancestors who came up with the idea of agriculture and for the people who practice it today.

If you don’t know, and even if you do know, agriculture is the planting, caring for and harvesting of crops or the raising of livestock. I have no interest whatsoever in doing any of those things, but I greatly appreciate the efforts of people who do. Actually, it’s not all that important to me whether they enjoy it, as long as someone does it.

The word agriculture can also refer to the science of growing and raising food, rather than the doing of it. Thank goodness for the agriculture scientists too. Without them, our farmers would not be able to raise enough food on our little planet to feed all seven-billion-plus of us.


Posted October 16, 2013 By Joel

Agreement can mean simply concurrence among two or more people. For example, my friends might say, “There is general agreement among us that Joel has proven himself to be a complete imbecile by undertaking his Words Project, which is not to say that there weren’t already strong indicators of that before then.” Yeah, my friends are like that.

Agreement might not refer to concurrence among people, but rather the concurrence of, say, documents. For example, newspapers might report that “The offender is in jail due to a lack of agreement between the documents he filed with the tax department and his real financial statements.”

As an honest taxpayer who wouldn’t have to pay as much as I do if everyone paid his or her due, I’m glad they caught the crook. I hope they also extracted a huge fine from him.

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